The Newest Olympic Sport… Cat Genocide

As you all know, the 2008 summer Olympics are coming up now that it is 2008. I’m sure you have all heard that China has been under a lot of pressure from several imperialist western countries to cut down on its slaughtering of its own citizens. Groups like Amnesty International have reported minor violations such as the “continued use of detention without trial as part of Beijing’s ‘clean up’ operations of the city ahead of the 2008 Games, despite the fact that substantial reform or abolition of methods of arbitrary detention including ‘Re-education through Labour’ has been on China’s reform agenda for many years.” As well as other minute details like “The application of the death penalty in China — the world’s top executioner — remains shrouded in secrecy,”. Now I’m sure you are as tired as I am of these fear-mongering whiners attempting to tarnish the image of a peaceful, quiet, non-threatening nation. I have tried to give the Chinese the benefit of the doubt when it came to forced abortion, forced labor camps, execution of journalists, execution of human-rights activists, censorship of the Internet, the slaughter of peaceful monks, wide spread torture, as well as the awful things they did to Jack Bauer. But this time they have gone TOO FAR!!

Over the past few weeks those communist dogs have began to round up poor, defenseless, fuzzy little kittens and have created “Kitty Death Camps” for those pitiful creatures. According to some reports the cats are forced into small cages and then transported to mysterious death camps for cats. I am sick and tired of seeing fuzzy wuzzy little creatures tortured to death! Its time we did something. Thats why I am in favor of formally petitioning congress to declare war on China. Our invasion will be swift and targeted. We must liberate these four-legged victims and restore them to their rightful places as disease-ridden scavengers on the streets of Beijing. Justice must not hold back her hand any longer. The time for action is now!

(I know that some of you will want to liberate those in forced-labor death camps for people, or stop forced abortions, but the United States cannot police the world. We can only help one species at a time, and unfortunatly humans will just have to get to the back of the line.)

The Sarcasm Ends Here _____________________________________________________

This is an important crossroads for the international community. If we turn a blind eye to the atrocities that have become common in China, and focus instead on which country wins the gold in table tennis, we will have missed a chance to wield influence over a powerful and secretive regime that enslaves billions. Thanks to our apathy our children will inherit a China that not only slaughters at will, but a China that has received the tacit approval of the rest of the world while they do it. The next generation will have to deal with an aggressive, arrogant regime in China because when we had a chance to do something about it, we were all watching the Olympics on TV.